Fun Volleyball Hitter Gifts: From Middle Blocker Myths to Hitter Drama

My fun volleyball hitter gifts on 16 oz glass cans celebrate front row life - where hitting percentage is optional but demanding sets is mandatory.

I created these fun volleyball hitter gifts because I decided to remind myself as to what goes through the mind of a front row player? 

From middles still in the air from last point to outsides demanding sets while down 0-15, front row players elevate volleyball drama to an Olympic-level event.

And I'm just getting started...especially since the professional outside hitting position was mine for years. 

I designed these premium 16 oz glass cans to celebrate the dedication, drama, and occasional delusions that make front row life so... interesting.

My collection captures the essence of hitter culture, where "Terminal Velocity Execution" means hitting it straight to the libero, and "Self-Importance Quantification" involves demanding sets while down 0-15.

But wait until you see what happens during actual game time...

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The middle blocker's day starts with "Lateral Movement Optimization" (running into the antenna) and often ends with "Energy Conservation Protocol" (pretending to be tired to skip approach lines).

And just when you think you've seen it all...

In between, they're mastering "Quick Attack Synchronization" (hitting the setter in the head) and perfecting their "Penetration Barrier Formation" (getting tooled by a short hitter).

The real expertise shows in their "Vertical Leap Timing" (still in the air from last point) and "Celebratory Response Activation" (screaming for a touch block). 

Whether they're implementing "Cardio Avoidance Strategy" (Coach, I think I twisted my ankle) or making an "Offensive Participation Request" (set me once per tournament please), middle blockers somehow make it all look like calculated strategy.

Speaking of strategic planning...

These dedicated athletes have mastered the art of "Net Violation Frequency" (taking the whole setup down with me) while simultaneously perfecting their "Transition Speed Calculation" (slower than Internet Explorer).

They've earned advanced degrees in "Defensive Gap Analysis" (watching balls drop between me and setter) and written dissertations on "Why The Set Was Too Low."

But the advanced courses are where things really get interesting...

The art of being a middle blocker requires mastering multiple disciplines. 

There's the physics of "Vertical Obstruction Deployment" (jumping three seconds too late), the mathematics of "Transition Velocity Management" (still blocking while everyone's attacking), and the advanced psychology of "Energy Conservation Protocol" (pretending to be tired to skip approach lines).

But that's just the foundation course...

Some middles achieve legendary status with their "Blocking Assignment Execution" (following the wrong setter).

They're the ones who can simultaneously miss the quick set, blame the setter's timing, and calculate their hitting percentage - all while maintaining perfect "Strategic Height Utilization" (getting blocked by the shortest blocker).

And then there's the advanced curriculum...

The truly elite middle blockers have mastered "Offensive Efficiency Metrics" (hitting negative but still starting) while perfecting their "Blocking Assignment Management" (following the wrong hitter... always).

They've developed sophisticated systems for "Statistical Reality Avoidance" (but I got one kill!) and "Team Contribution Analysis" (at least I'm tall).

Let's not forget the specialty courses...

These include advanced studies in "Quick Attack Theory" (swinging three feet from the ball) and doctoral-level research in "Net Height Verification" (taking the whole setup down with me).

Some middles even pursue post-doctoral work in "Conditioning Evasion Tactics" (volunteering to shag during sprints).

Speaking of volleyball players who believe they invented the sport, let's explore the fascinating world of those who've mastered "Error Attribution Protocol" and the art of demanding sets while losing...

The art of being an outside hitter requires mastering multiple specialized disciplines.

There's the advanced mathematics of "Statistical Manipulation" (that touch doesn't count as an error), the creative writing of "Performance Analysis" (explaining why you should still get sets), and the complex physics of "Error Attribution" (the sun was in my eyes - indoors).

But that's just the foundation course...

Some outsides achieve legendary status with their "Social Media Documentation" (posting only the one good hit).

They're the ones who can simultaneously demand sets, critique the setter's decisions, and update their recruiting profile - all while maintaining perfect "Self-Importance Quantification" (demanding sets while down 0-15).

And then there's the advanced curriculum...

The truly elite outside hitters have mastered "Defensive Avoidance Strategy" (tying shoes during serve receive) while perfecting their "Approach Angle Calibration" (jumping into the 10-foot line).

They've developed sophisticated systems for "Emergency Protocol Activation" (roll shot when coach says swing) and "Terminal Velocity Execution" (hitting it straight to the libero).

Let's not forget the specialty courses...

These include advanced studies in "Performance Metrics Evaluation" (checking stats between points) and doctoral-level research in "Vertical Reach Exaggeration" (adding 6 inches to recruiting profile). Some outsides even pursue post-doctoral work in "Communication Interface Development" (calling for the ball after it hits the floor).

The graduate program includes...

- Advanced "Shot Selection Justification" (tipping when up by 15)
- Masters in "Setter Blame Distribution" (the set was too low/high/tight/off)
- PhD in "Conditioning Evasion Tactics" (volunteering to shag during sprints)
- Post-doc in "Block Touch Detection" (swearing every block touched it)

The outside hitter curriculum starts with basic "Approach Angle Calibration" (jumping into the 10-foot line) but quickly advances to complex subjects like "Terminal Velocity Execution" (hitting it straight to the libero).

These dedicated athletes perfect their craft while mastering "Performance Metrics Evaluation" (checking my stats between points) and "Emergency Protocol Activation" (roll shot when coach says swing).

But that's just the first rotation...

Advanced practitioners excel in "Self-Importance Quantification" (demanding sets while down 0-15) while simultaneously managing "Error Attribution Protocol" (the sun was in my eyes - indoors).

They've developed sophisticated theories about "Social Media Documentation" (posting only the one good hit) and written dissertations on "Why Every Ball Should Come to Me."

The graduate-level courses get even more intense...

Outside hitters pursuing their doctorate must master "Defensive Avoidance Strategy" (tying shoes during serve receive) while conducting field research in "Vertical Reach Exaggeration" (adding 6 inches to recruiting profile).

They become experts in "Statistical Manipulation" (that touch doesn't count as an error) and "Conditioning Evasion Tactics" (volunteering to shag during sprints).

And just when you thought you'd seen the pinnacle of hitter drama, enter the mysterious world of opposite hitters - the ones who've turned "Positional Awareness Protocol" (lost in rotation since 2019) into an art form...

The opposite hitter's journey begins with "Blocking Trajectory Analysis" (getting tooled by the 5'2" setter) and evolves into mastering "Cross-Court Defense Allocation" (watching the line shot go by).

These specialized athletes have developed their own unique curriculum, starting with "Attack Variation Implementation" (tipping when up by 15) and "Setter Coverage Optimization" (standing there while setter chases ball).

But that's just the basic certification...

Advanced opposite hitters excel in "Rotation Confusion Syndrome" (wait, am I supposed to be here?) while perfecting their "Hitting Strategy Execution" (swinging into the antenna... again).

They've pioneered groundbreaking research in "Defensive Positioning Protocol" (ducking behind the setter) and "Vertical Reach Optimization" (jumping after the set goes by).

The specialized coursework gets even more intense...

These right-side scholars must master "Team Contribution Analysis" (at least I'm tall) while conducting extensive studies in "Blocking Assignment Management" (following the wrong hitter... always).

They've earned prestigious degrees in "Statistical Reality Avoidance" (but I got one kill!) and "Offensive Efficiency Metrics" (hitting negative but still starting).

The truly dedicated opposites go even further...

The graduate-level courses get even more intense...

They've developed complex theories about "Strategic Height Utilization" (getting blocked by the shortest blocker) while maintaining their expertise in "Positional Awareness Protocol" (lost in rotation since 2019).

Some even pursue advanced research in "Net Violation Frequency" (taking the whole setup down with me) and "Transition Speed Calculation" (slower than Internet Explorer).

The truly dedicated go even further...

From middle blockers still airborne from last point to outside hitters demanding sets while down 0-15, from opposites lost in rotation since 2019 to everyone blaming the setter, front row players deserve more than just a "nice hit!"

These premium 16 oz glass cans celebrate their dedication with humor, style, and a much-needed dose of reality. Each USA-made tumbler comes with a bamboo lid and glass straw, perfect for those long tournament days when you're simultaneously:

- Perfecting your "Error Attribution Protocol"
- Mastering "Statistical Reality Avoidance"
- Managing your "Energy Conservation Strategy"
- Executing "Quick Attack Synchronization" (and missing)
- Practicing "Rotation Confusion Syndrome"
- Maintaining your "Self-Importance Quantification"

Whether you're shopping for a middle who's earned their PhD in "Cardio Avoidance Strategy," an outside hitter who's mastered the art of "Statistical Manipulation," or an opposite who's still trying to figure out which rotation they're in, these designs capture the perfect blend of athleticism and delusion that makes front row life so... special.

Choose from our "Still In The Air From Last Point" middle blocker collection, "But I Got One Kill" outside hitter series, or "Lost In Rotation Since 2019" opposite hitter designs.

Each glass can tells the story of what really happens when hitting percentage becomes your entire personality.

Ready to celebrate the beautiful chaos of front row life? These premium 16 oz glass cans are available in three perfect-for-your-position collections:

🏐 "Still In The Air From Last Point" - For middles who perfect the art of being "too tired" for approach lines
🏐 "But I Got One Kill" - For outside hitters who believe every set should be theirs
🏐 "Lost In Rotation Since 2019" - For opposites who make getting lost look strategic

Each USA-made tumbler comes with a bamboo lid and glass straw, perfect for:
- Hydrating between your "cardio-avoiding" episodes
- Sipping while explaining why that touch doesn't count as an error
- Drinking away the memory of getting tooled by the shortest setter

Don't wait until you're blocked by another short player or lost in another rotation - order your position-specific glass can today! Click any design to get yours now, and remember: front row players who order within the next 24 hours get first priority on sets*

(*Results may vary. Setter approval not guaranteed. Hitting percentage requirements still apply.)

P.S. These make perfect gifts for:

- The middle who's "still transitioning" from three points ago
- The outside who screenshots their one good hit
- The opposite who's convinced they're in the right spot
- Any front row player who needs to hydrate while maintaining their dignity

Click now - because sometimes volleyball life requires professional-grade beverage support and a healthy sense of humor!

Follow me on Pinterest Volleybragswag to improve your game even faster!

I share alot of individual, partner and easy-to-do volleyball serving drills we do in class with my followers.

Many of these volleyball practice drills you can do at home by yourself or try at your next practice with your teammates.

If you're a B team or JV player trying to make varsity next year...your goal should be to complete 1000 reps a day of at least three of the basic skills on your own...volleyball passing, serving and setting should be at the top of the list. 

From Lady Vol to Legend: Coach April Produces Powerful Passionate Players...is that you?

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